As I sat with my closest girlfriends on our routine girls’ night out (GNO) one Saturday evening, the suspense at the table didn’t go unnoticed.
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He is absolutely in love with his child, and that makes him even more attractive to me. While we look for stability in relationships, dating someone who has a child shouldn’t pose a threat.
Seeing a man love and care for his child genuinely is a beautiful thing. It’s all about building that relationship on the basics, as you would any other, with love, trust, understanding, and commitment, among other things.
Of course, I was also nervous that my guy would analyse me. There will be many challenges and the occasional stress factors involved, but if he’s really worth getting to know… Like I said, many more single people have children now, and, while some people have strict rules about wanting someone, who may be like them, single and childless, dating a single parent isn’t akin to the plague.
All you need to do is take a deep breath, and make sure you can handle all the other variables that come along with this relationship.
All women aren’t the same and not every ex will bring drama or real ‘tote’ because of her ‘child fadda’s’ present relationship. My guy possesses the main characteristics I usually go for, smart, sensitive, ambitious etc. So does this make a man with a child more marriage worthy?
I also get to witness the type of dad he really is, and he handles his role and responsibilities as a father well. I remember thinking, “Please don’t cry if I hold your hand”. Does having a child mean that he is even more ready for long-term commitment, even with the extra baggage? While, on my end, there is no talk of running down an aisle anytime soon, as the relationship progresses, who knows what may happen.
I’m starting to fall for him, but there’s something that has been bothering me more and more.
About a month before we met, he slept with a friend of his, and she became pregnant (the condom broke and she took Plan B – supposedly). She decided to keep the baby, which was disappointing for him at first, but he is now excited and making the best of it.
As I sat with my closest girlfriends on our routine girls’ night out (GNO) one Saturday evening, the suspense at the table didn’t go unnoticed. Alas, I admit, those were my exact words, but those words were also spoken by a much younger and not so much wiser version of myself. Obviously, there are several issues to deal with when someone has a child. Do you think you’ll get jealous when you have to share him, and can’t throw a tantrum because you’ll ‘look bad’ for being jealous of a child? trying to pacify the mother so his relationship with his child isn’t affected, and keeping his ‘woman’ comfortable.